He had a miscarriage and now wants to return pregnant. For that doctors advised him to rest longer, if necessary out of a job. “Weight nian I left a long career that I pioneered,” he said. How is the solution?

“I am a career woman, aged 33 years, working in a national private company established. It has been three years since I got married, but until now not been blessed with baby.

Mother Goddess Frankly, I had a miscarriage in the first year of our marriage. I really felt lost, but what can I say, the condition of the body is not strong. Moreover, I was not able to reduce activity in the office, as recommended by the obstetrician at the time.

Now I want to get pregnant again. The doctor suggested that I take a leave of absence (at least six months), if necessary, get out of a job. The point is that I can concentrate on the preparation process of pregnancy, the pregnancy itself, until the next delivery.

As a woman who is very active, enjoying life offices, and has the ambition to achieve a certain position in the company, the advice is not easy to do. Weight nian I left a long career that I pioneered. I think I have to make decisions that much harder than to get married.

The husband is very good because in this case, he gave me the decision. He wanted to have children, but not forced, if I can not afford to rest long.

My advice Mother Goddess beg, how to choose two things that it’s equally important to me this. Son important, but career is also important. I’m confused. “

Seriousness
Your confusion is far more based on the lack of seriousness to examine more deeply and seriously in an effort to make a decision. And who can take decisions in this case is your own.

Success to decide it could be assisted by others, including her husband, but the nature of the assistance is to give or add information. With that information, you can create a number of alternatives that you ultimately have to choose the most suitable.

Group Two Questions
In this case I tried to help by asking a few questions with the thought behind the question.

First: What actually be your main desire in life right now? Do you really need the experience of being a successful woman in a career? Is if you do not succeed in the career world, you will feel a total failure as a person? Is the meaning of your life will decline or disappear in the absence of a career for the time being?

Second: What is the ultimate fantasy for your life to settle down? Do you want to achieve or family longing for happiness which must be completed by the child? Does the presence of children in a marriage have a very important meaning for you as a woman? Do you expect the child as a source of both happiness with her husband?

Is not there a child in a marriage can bring things more negative for the life ahead?

This is just a few of the questions that require reflection and the answer really from you personally.

Take consequence
If your answers to questions about career proceed from a very deep need for recognition that the career is everything for you and your husband, so the consequences need to be considered.
Each choice is always accompanied by a certain consequence. This is where the importance for you to weigh or calculate the consequences which must be taken and face of each option.

One of the consequences and choose the option to stay and pursue a future career in the world is that you really may not be a mother in the near future. This is due to physical conditions that have not or are not possible.

There are many other consequences that can be described more of your choice to continue a career. Among others at one point suddenly the husband desperately wanted a child. Suddenly you realize one day want to have children, but age was not possible. How did you have to fill in life when suddenly felt lonely because of the absence of children at home?

If you have an answer to the question of the two groups, which want to and feel means or means to be a mother, could feel the birth, nurture, educate, and raise a child, it also has a number of consequences.

The consequence was clear already in sight is to reduce activity, in this case may be stopped from working for a while. There are still other consequences, for example, you must face the fact that for the loss of the social environment which is owned today.

Other consequences may be willing to accept money from her husband and may have to restrict the freedom to purchase private purposes so as not to disrupt the household expenses.

Concept I
There is a concept that teaches us to be more focused in achieving the level or desired form of life. The concept was first correctly emphasizes recognition of what we most want in life.

This desire is not just going to happy, happy, relaxed, rich, which is basically too abstract to understand. What is meant by what he most wants is something more concrete, specific, and measurable by time, cost, or level, such as what, when, what, where.

During the answer about wanting to be what, when, where and so it was not yet specific and concrete, you really do not have a clear desire and direction. This often makes you still confused.

And if you try to try to achieve it, the work done is often less effective. Therefore, ambition (A) must be clear. If already have or can determine what is most desirable, it was not meaning that you will definitely make it.

The second element is important to be explored is anything that is a condition (K) or the fact that can support or hinder the achievement of this activity. The definition of the condition or fact are owned healthcare, financial condition, moral and material support from people who expected, natural conditions, the atmosphere of family life, and the like.

We often forget that the supporting factors are important in achieving the target. Moreover, in family life and social, others need to be taken into consideration. Because we may be surprised to find a fact that one family member can suddenly emerged as a barrier.

There is no such desire can be fulfilled without an attempt to achieve it, even if some conditions are properly considered. Whether or not done what we desire is still to be largely determined by the strong and weak or large and small businesses (U) we headed goal.

Confused, waiting to see how later, depending on the circumstances, only the reasons for not doing a real effort, Maybe because they have not explained your wishes, may also not enough information what I can to support and not.

I think the description of the three elements in the concept that I can help you to start thinking about, then make a decision and do something.

A confusion hit when your relationship and your partner did not improve, so that you both feared might happen. Divorce, these words often cause stress and the specter of both of you, especially to those who already have a child.

It’s so hard to talk about the separation that will occur in your baby. You are afraid of their reaction to an unexpected and perhaps they would not accept the new circumstances. Some of the following methods may be applied when the hardest decision of divorce, should be taken as a last resort.

1. Let your child know about the possibility of divorce from the beginning
Frankly, even though they were little, your child is not the individual who can not see the discrepancies parents. Maybe when you both disagree, you do not realize that your child is watching you.

Please tell the situation was happening and could happen to them, do not let your child like feel in the dark. Do not know anything about the possibility of divorce they will face.

In fact, they even have realized that “something” was going on before you make the decision to divorce. No need to lay out the details for your child. But, if you intend to take a divorce decision, let the main reason why you made that decision. This discussion should be done when you are calm and able to control your emotions.

As much as possible not to let children become lean on you in this divorce case, however they too will experience major changes in their lives. We recommend that you should remember that those who let you rely on your not convergent to them to find comfort that you do not get from the couple.

Remember, you may not feel like it, but often in divorce situations, children become the parents back flow and it is not good. However, your child does not need to hear that your partner is insolent and ungrateful or vilify bad attitude is not your spouse?

2. Reassure children that they are not the cause
When talking to children, let them know that they are not the cause of divorce you both. Possibly, if your child has started their teens might feel responsible for any errors that occur. However, explain to children that this is a decision that was taken both, and you both will always be there for them as parents. Although no longer together, they will still be your child and spouse.

Affirm your child that if there is difficulty accepting the situation, you and your partner will listen to the difficulty and will help it through this difficult period. If your child is having excessive difficulty in accepting the situation, then invite your child to an expert in this field.

3. Make plans with your child after a divorce occurs
Make sure that you keep making plans with your child and spouse as well as a family. However, your child should be involved in making decisions when your partner will see your child, especially if your partner lives far from you.

4. Create a consensus rule
Divorce is both a cause you stress. Yes … that’s true, but still there are things to talk about, especially if you both live a different house. There is a need to apply the same rules you both through the agreement of your child and what can and can not do it.

This applies both when your child is in your house or your spouse at home. Remember, do not use that phrase to discredit your partner. However your child can not see you and your spouse are each talking about their respective shortcomings. And in addition, do not use your child as your business intermediary and partner, for example, “Mom said to …”

This is not healthy, you should talk directly to each other so that your child does not feel a mediator and feel responsible for your arguments both for you and the couple reconciled.